Hail

What's that tap tap tapping on the roof? It's hail. Thank goodness the car's in the garage. The storm didn't last very long, and the ice balls were only the size of peas.

Hail is formed through a sort-of roller coaster ride through intense thunderstorms. Strong air currents lift small ice pellets high into the middle and upper portions of a cumulonimbus cloud. This is where super-cooled water droplets collide and the ice pellet grows through a process called accretion. Once the pellet is too heavy for the updrafts to keep it airborne, it begins to fall, and if it does not melt completely before reaching ground level, it comes out as hail. A little internet research enlightened me that hail can be classified into three stages of development, Grauple, Small Hail, and Hailstones.

Grauple are soft snowflake-like stuctures that bounce off hard surfaces. We usually call it snow pellets.
Small hail: Has a higher density than grauple, and are usually semitransparent and rounded, with diameters up to 1/5 inch. They consist partly of liquid water and sometimes have a frozen outer shell. Graupel transforms into small hail by the liquid water taken in through air capillaries in the ice framework.
Hailstones: Round stones of ice, with layers that look like an onion. Layers are formed during the stones and rise and fall within the storm cloud. During the a decent, the outer layer of ice melts slightly, and then re-freezes when updrafts carry the hail back up into freezing temperatures. The more clear the hailstone is, the slower the freezing process. The more opaque (milky) the hailstone is, the faster the freezing process.

Our little pea-sized pellets are pikers compared to the Largest Hailstone Ever Reported:
September 3rd, 1970 Coffeyville, KS 1.67 lbs, 17.5 in in circumference, 5.5in in diameter
(about the size of a softball.)

Crazed Robins won't take 'No' for an answer

In the past, we've had Robins (turdus migratorius)
((alright, stop snickering about the first name you juveniles!))
build nests on the outdoor lights by the back door, and in the crook of the downspout. Now the birds are trying to build on the mailbox by the front door.

Not a workable situation for the Postal Service, I'm sure, so I removed the materials when I retrieved the newspaper from the driveway. Later this morning, after hearing a big truck down the street (big trucks always gets a guy's attention,) I went out the front door to check on it (yard waste pickup day)
((don't get all over me for not recycling the stuff, it's branches and stuff that won't break down in a year's time in the compost))
(((see yesterday's Green Thursday blog entry)))
((((If our village was a little more progressive, we might have a yard waste recycling center.))))
Where was I? Outside the door checking on the truck, when lo and behold, the Robins had tried to rebuild, only higher up, on the front porch light.

This will not do, either, because when the eggs hatch, Mom gets all protectivy and swoops and hollers at anything coming close. Again, not workable for the Postal Service, so I removed the nest beginnings.

Let's hope the Robins have more sense to try a little more secluded location for their new home. They're almost as stubborn as President Bush on his failed Iraq policy.

Here's a whole website devoted to all things Robin.

Green Thursday: (Yard)waste not, want not

Another season of mowing is upon us. Grass, leaves, and other wastes from lawns and backyard gardens account for an estimated 18% of the annual municipal waste stream. The percentage and composition of yard wastes varies widely from season to season. During the summer, grass can comprise up to 50% of municipal waste. Leaf waste can account for as much as 60-80% in the fall. This massive, seasonal volume of yard wastes can put a strain on municipal garbage collection systems. Collection can require extra equipment that is not needed year-round and can increase personnel expenses.

Yard waste is a strain on disposal facilities. The large volume uses up valuable landfill space. The high moisture content of yard waste retards burning, which reduces the efficiency of waste-to-energy plants. Large incinerators built to handle peak seasonal rates of yard waste, may be oversized and less efficient at burning wastes the rest of the year. Burning yard wastes also puts a strain on pollution control systems. Burning yard wastes at home causes air pollution from carbon dioxide and nitrogen oxide, is a fire hazard, and is a nuisance to neighbors.

Here's what we do in the LipsYard:

Mulching blade, baby. This one's called the 'gator' because of the teeth on the back of the blade that makes even smaller pieces out of the clippings. Leaving grass clippings on the lawn after mowing ensures that nutrients will be returned to the soil. Grass clippings are 20-30% protein, and usually contain about 4% nitrogen, 2% potassium and 0.5% phosphorus as well as all the necessary trace elements plants need.

When leaving clippings on the lawn, adjust your lawn mower to remove no more than one third (1/3) of the grass leaf surface at any one mowing. We're at the 2" height on grass right now, but as the summer comes on, we'll go up to 3" because it's healthier for the lawn.

Every Green Thursday, LipsYard will deal with an issue vital to our global environment.

New York to Paris; soaking wet

My friend, Ralph, clued me in that it's not "All work and No play" at Google. Someone took the time, between buying everything else in the world, to insert a little humor on their Google Maps page.

Go to Google Maps then type "New York to Paris." Things get interesting around step 23.

If you're lazy, just click this link.

These little hidden jokes are called "Easter Eggs."

They're hidden in computer software, movies, music, art, books, or even your watch, by the geeks who write the computer code.

There are thousands of them, and if you go to this site, you'll be busy amusing yourself for a long time.

Spring 2007, planting seeds

After careful inspection of the LipsYard, we found several spots that need re-seeding in the lawn. We had one big hole in the front LipsYard from an underground rotting tree root, and a couple more in the back.

What needed the most work was the area under the Pagoda Dogwood (Cornus alternifolia,) which is very shady and tends to wash away with heavy rains.

First step was to fill in the area with a good garden soil, then apply a shady grass seed, and finally add a light layer of little pellets that expand when they get wet, providing protection, warmth and moisture for the seed. Now all we need to do is keep the ground moist and wait for the seeds to germinate.

Seeds of another kind, discontent, were planted over the weekend; Rep. Dennis Kucinich (D-Ohio) sent a letter to his fellow members of Congress to join him in Articles of Impeachment against Vice President Dick Cheney. It's brilliant to go after Mr. Cheney first, because if you impeach President Bush, then Cheney takes over.

Whether these seeds germinate and take root is yet to be seen, but we can always hope.

Peck Peck Peck

Look who's pecking away in the LipsYard! Melanerpes erythrocephalus, the Red Headed Woodpecker. It looks like he's trying to get into the birdhouse through the cellar, but the bottom is open, with suet ready for the eating behind a screen.

I'm guessing embattled Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez is feeling a bit like the suet these days, after all that pesky oversight pecking that the Democrats in Congress have been doing. Maybe a few more questions will jog his hazy memory a bit.

Six years of "See no evil, Hear no evil, Speak no evil" in the Bush Administration are over and it's time to do some 'splainin'.

Green Thursday: Earth Day Haiku

Trees and all creatures
Dependent on each other
Can’t survive alone

Valerie Belz, 8th grade, Sewickley, PA

(If an 8th grader can understand this, why can't the Bush administration?)

Celebrate Earthday on Sunday April 22, 2007, and all life long.

Every Green Thursday, LipsYard will deal with an issue vital to our global environment.

Too lazy to brush

A year ago, at my regular dental checkup, my hygienist suggested that I should look into an electric toothbrush. I've always had good tooth habits, brushing and flossing, but as age creeps up on us, our gums tend to creep away from our teeth.


To asuage this recession, I've been using little wooden (originally) and now plastic Stimudents for several years to massage the gums and keep them virile.





Even this isn't enough any more, and when Charmaine's hygienist told her to look into an electric toothbrush for much the same reason, we bit the bullet. Say hello to our little pal, Oral B.

And check out how "youthful" the couple in the ad are. I hope we become like them.

This baby vibrates away in our mouths, making our teeth shiny and bright, and our gums healthy and pink. It even runs for two minutes, (the recommended brushing time,) then pulses off and on to let you know you can quit. It isn't without problems, though. Who knew that you could create so much toothpaste foam? We're spitting constantly! And at first, we did it with wide-mouthed excitement, a fine minty cavity fighting mist enveloping our head (and mirror and countertop and shirt.) Another shortcoming is where to plug it in? It has to charge constantly, so now it's clutter on the countertop, and we each have our own detachable brush head, that now makes a sloppy puddle in the medicine cabinet.

The thought of an electric toothbrush always seemed to invoke an image of laziness, something the rich and famous would use, (perhaps in, say Kennebunkport,) but if both our professionals wanted us to use one, so be it.

The history of the electric toothbrush (here's the Wikipedia page) goes back to the late 1800s when a "Dr. Scott" claimed to invent an "electric" toothbrush. The bristles didn't move, it just sent a strong electrical current through the brush to whoever was using it at the time. Ouch!

The first actual electric toothbrush was sold in 1939 in Switzerland, and debuted in the States in 1960.

I found many websites that questioned whether an electric toothbrush actually did anything more for you than regular brushing, but I'm buying the theory that we become complacent in our manual brushing, even lazy, and the electric brush adds renewed vigor to this daily task.

The Taxman Cometh (2 days late)

The usual IRS tax deadline of April 15 came and went without the usual wringing of hands over 1040 forms and such. That's because it fell on a Sunday, so we got an extra day for filing. But wait a minute, in the Northeast, Monday, April 16 is a holiday; Patriot Day. We never celebrated that here in Wisconsin. No wonder my conservative friends always call me 'un-Patriotic.' In the District of Columbia, not even a voting member of Congress, they celebrate Emancipation Day on Monday, April 16, in honor of Abraham Lincoln's signing of the act that freed the slaves. IRS headquarters are in DC, so they were off, too. Apparently what's good for the goose, is good for the rest of the nation, so today, April 17, 2007, your tax obligation to Uncle Sam is due by midnight, tonight. (Unless you file for an extension.)

So where do our tax dollars go? MSNBC has a great article that showed how every $1,000 collected in fees and taxes was spent. I've stolen some of it here:

$219.40 Medicare and Medicaid
$206.60 The Social Security fund

$196.50 Military

$132.70 “Income security” which includes things like unemployment insurance, food and nutrition programs, housing assistance, and the cost of retirement for federal workers

$85.30 Interest on the National Debt
$44.60 Education

$26.50 Transportation

$17.40 Disaster relief

$15.40 Justice, including federal law enforcement, federal courts and prisons

$12.40 The Environment

$9.80 Agriculture

$6.90 General government costs

$6.30 International humanitarian assistance

$5.50 NASA
$3.40 General science and research

$3.20 Embassys and ambassadors

$3.20 Community and regional development.

$2.90 Security outside our borders.

To figure out the actual amount spent, just multiply each item by 2,700,000,000. Now yer talkin' real money!

Frost! A drop spreader's best friend.

Woke up this morning to find a fine, frozen mist on the LipsYard lawn.


Time to slip into the waterproof garden shoes...

and hoist the Drop Spread off the wall and get the pre-emergent on.


Checking the bag, as higlighted in last Green Thursday's LipsYard Blog, there were two Scotts spreaders listed with different settings numbers for each. Our spreader didn't have any name markings on it, so I made the executive decision to choose 7.0.


Changing the number changes the size of the holes in the bottom of the spreader, which determines how much material drops through to the ground.

Here's the spreader loaded for bear.

You can see the lines in the LipsYard lawn from the spreader wheels, making in easy to see where you've been to avoid missing spots. These turn up in a couple of weeks a lot yellower than the rest, causing much embarassment.

Hopefully, missing e-mails in the US Attorneys scandal will serve the same purpose as guides for Congressional investigators, showing the path that Attorney General Alberto Gonzales/Karl Rove/Harriet Miers took in the firings.

Friday the 13th

Are you a Paraskevidekatriaphobic? That's the fancy pants word for fear of Friday the 13th.

The sixth day of the week and the number 13 both have foreboding reputations said to date from ancient times, and their inevitable conjunction from one to three times a year portends great misfortune. It may be the most widespread superstition in the United States, affecting nearly 21 million people. Some won't go to work on Friday the 13th; some won't eat in restaurants; many wouldn't think of setting a wedding on the date.

One theory has the fear going back to ancient times, when the Egyptians' 13th phase of life was 'death.' They celebrated the move to the afterlife, but not so much the Christians, who made the number 13 unlucky. (There were 13 at the Last Supper.)

Another story takes the man vs. woman battle to the heavens, where there are 13 lunar (or menstrual) cycles in a year (female,) as opposed to the solar calendar of 12 months in a year (male.) Men, naturally, wanting to be the boss, made 13 an unlucky number.

There is a Viking tale about a Valhalla dinner feast gone wrong when the evil Loki crashed the party, making 13 guests.

A witches coven has 13 members.

Then what's so wrong with Friday? Christendom has it that Eve tempted Adam with the forbidden fruit on a Friday. The Great Flood began on a Friday; God tongue-tied the builders of the Tower of Babel on a Friday; the Temple of Solomon was destroyed on a Friday; and, of course, Friday was the day of the week on which Christ was crucified.

The Brits, attempting to dispel the superstition among seamen that setting sail on Fridays was unlucky, commissioned a ship named "H.M.S. Friday." They laid her keel on a Friday, launched her on a Friday, selected her crew on a Friday and hired a man named Jim Friday to be her captain. To top it off, H.M.S. Friday embarked on her maiden voyage on a Friday, and was never seen or heard from again!

So how did Friday and the 13th together become the worst of all? Nobody really knows. There is nothing in literature prior to 1800 that even mentions the convergence. Some scholars are now convinced the stigma is a thoroughly modern phenomenon overblown by 20th-century media hype. Great, one more thing for the neo-con talkers and Fox News to blame on the "mainstream media."

Perpetuating the superstition more than anything are the series of movies of the same name.

Here's the scariest thing for me on this Friday the 13th:

Green Thursday: Phosphorus = 0

Advertising their new phosphorus free lawn fertilizer has paid off for Stein Garden and Gifts, at least in the LipsYard. We're going to give their new line of Milorganite based turf products a try this season. First up is the Crabgrass Preventer. (Full Disclosure: Stein does advertise on my radio station. We paid full retail for the product and did not ask for me to talk about it.) A lot of times we feel helpless in fighting for green issues, but this is a great way to Think Globaly - Act Locally.

The guy at the store told us that it's a new regulation that phosphorus not be put on lawns more than 5 years old. New lawns still need the chemical for root development, but once established, it doesn't. I'm also told that our soil is naturally high in phosphorus to begin with, so it's really not needed at all.

Damage from phosphorus happens when runoff from lawns goes directly into a city's storm sewer system, which typically empty directly into streams, rivers or lakes. This over-stimulates algea growth, which throws off the natural balance of things, resulting in lower fish populations and dirtier water.

How can you tell if there's any phosphorus in your fertilizer? Check the second number on the package formula. 15—0—10, for example, means zero phosphate. These are always listed in this order.

Every Green Thursday, LipsYard will deal with an issue vital to our global environment.

Snow joke

Snowy Daffodils (Narcissus) in our LipsYard neighbor's garden on April 11, 2007.

The record for the heaviest April snowfall in Milwaukee is 14 inches, set on April 16, 1921. Other big April white-outs include 8 inches April 23, 1910; 11.6 inches April 9, 1973; 10.2 inches April 2, 1975; 8.6 inches April 5, 1982, and 6.6 inches April 7, 2000. The spring snow everyone remembers is May 10, 1990, when over 3 inches of snow fell.

No doubt the conservative voices around us, especially the on-air neo-con water-carriers (and aren't they really tired yet?) will say "Snow in April, there's no global warming!" Then make a joke about 'liberal wing-nut scientists.' Unfortunately, these claims play upon the public's ignorance of the difference between weather and climate.

weath·er [weth-er]
the current state of the atmosphere with respect to wind, temperature, cloudiness, moisture, pressure, etc.

cli·mate [klahy-mit]
the composite or generally prevailing weather conditions of a region, as temperature, air pressure, humidity, precipitation, sunshine, cloudiness, and winds, throughout the year, averaged over a series of years.

Even Newt Gingrich has abandoned the Bush administration's long-standing policy of claiming that global warming was just "bad science." In a debate with John Kerry, presidential wanna-be Gingrich called for a "Green Conservatism" that relies on free-market incentives to business as an alternative to government regulation.

Enjoy the April snow, no need to shovel, it'll melt in a day.

I've been to outer space, how about you?

Ever 'googled' yourself? I did, and found out that my name was on a microchip with a million other earthlings that went into space and returned. It was project Stardust, the first NASA mission to return particles from beyond the Earth Moon orbit. Our brave little spacecraft was launched on February 7, 1999 from Cape Canaveral. Weighing only 770 pound, it is the size of an average desk, except for the solar panels, which extend several feet in the front and back.

The plan was to fly by the Comet P/Wild 2 at a relatively slow 6 km/sec (about 6 times the speed of a rifle bullet,) and capture comet dust within a sticky substance called aerogel. January 2, 2004 the successful flyby of the 3 mile diameter comet took place.

Then the return capsule was jettisoned back to earth, where it landed in the Utah desert in the early morning hours of January 15, 2006. The rest of Stardust still roams outer space.

Back to my original discovery of names in space. It seems NASA wanted to put a human face on this project, and encouraged people to submit names to go on microchips. Not just my name is on the chip, but the whole LaBelle clan. I asked my parents if they put our names on it, and they said no. I'm going to assume it's my brother, who has a place in Florida, or his kids who visit, who put our family name into the cosmos on a trip to NASA. Also on the microchips are pictures of the project's creators and managers, like this one, where they pose with Buzz Lightyear. This is really going to improve our image with aliens.

In checking the other names on the list, there is a George Bush (minus the W,) but no Dick Cheney or Karl Rove. A lack of other notable politicos makes me think its not THE George Bush, so the 'taint' is off this project.

Here comes Peter Cottontail...

Easter is a tasty time for the candy industry. The 2006 season saw almost $1.9 billion in candy sales - second only to Halloween, which took in $2.1 billion. Each year, more than 90 million chocolate bunnies and 16 billion jelly beans (red is the favorite color) are made for the holiday. Each day, more than 5 million marshmallow eggs, bunnies and chicks are fluffed and dyed.

So how did the candied critters become a staple of one of the widest spread religious holidays in the world? Not so fast right-wingers! As easy as it might be to blame present day candy companies, Easter goodies can be traced back to the 1300s, when monks would pass out buns to the poor to eat on Good Friday. Though the icing-crossed bun was originally part of pagan culture, it was later reinterpreted as a cross to promote Christianity.

The Easter bunny also has pagan origins. The Hare and the Rabbit were the most fertile animals known and they served as symbols of the new life during the Spring season. The Easter bunny started in Germany, where it was first mentioned in writings in the 1500s. The first edible Easter bunnies were made in Germany during the early 1800s, made of pastry and sugar. When the Germans came to America, the Easter bunny came with them. His arrival was considered childhood's greatest pleasure next to a visit from Santa on Christmas Eve. The kids believed that if they were good, the Easter bunny would lay a nest of colored eggs (never mind that they don't lay eggs.) Boys would use their caps and girls their bonnets to make the nests in a secluded place in the home, the barn or the garden. These were the first Easter baskets.

Something new in the candy aisle this year are sugar-free Peeps and other better-for-you items, stemming from the issues with childhood obesity and diabetes. Candy sellers also have taken the hint that the Easter Bunny is no longer exclusively visiting children. Higher-end chocolatiers such as Russell Stover, Dove and Lindt are appealing to grown-up tastes with items like dark chocolate rabbits wrapped in elegant gold foil (my personal favorite.)

Green Thursday: Butt heads

We've all stepped over piles of them in parking lots, yesterday, a guy on I-43 flicked his out the window and hit my car. Kids on their way to high school toss theirs on my lawn. Could you all keep your butts to yourself, please?

This guy in Canada took things into his own hands, literally...




Globally, approximately 4.3 trillion cigarette butts are littered every year. Smokers in the USA account for over 250 billion cigarette butts. In most Western countries cigarette butts account for around 50% of all litter.

Almost 1 in 3 cigarette butts end up as litter

It can take up to 12 years for a cigarette butt to break down

I've seen them on beaches all around the world. Gross. Cigarette butts can leach chemicals such as cadmium, lead and arsenic into the marine environment within an hour of contact with water. Cigarette butts have been found in the stomachs of fish, whales, birds and other marine animals which leads to ingestion of hazardous chemicals and digestive blockages

Only smokers can stop cigarette butt litter.

Every Green Thursday, LipsYard will deal with an issue vital to our global environment.

The Cost of Divorce

The numbers are out on what Britney Spears will pay to Kevin Federline in their divorce settlement.

A 2004 pre-nup called for K-Fed to get $250,000 for each year of their marriage, but Spears upped that figure to $500,000 to speed up the negotiations.

He receives half the proceeds from their Malibu mansion, which is on the market for $13.5 million.

$25,000 a month in child support for each of the couple’s two children until they reach 18. (How can you SPEND that much on child support?)

He also gets custody of the boys four days a week.

Federline gets to keep all the gifts Spears bought them during their marriage.

He’s forbidden from writing a tell-all about their marriage.

Total cost: $13.5 million

Back in 1987 my divorce cost me:

A sofa

A sofa table

Dining room table and chairs

A TV and VCR

(Luckily her apartment building wouldn't allow waterbeds, or I'd have lost that, too.)

Total cost: $4,000 But unlike Brit, who'll just write a check, I didn't have that kind of money, so I made it up by doing two years worth of commercials and store appearances for the replacement stuff.

Life lesson learned: You make your mistake, you pay the price, you move on. Good luck kids.

Vote

Nothing as trivial as who will be our next president on today's ballot, just a couple of minor things, like the education of our future leaders, and the direction we're ready to let our State Supreme Court take. Get out and VOTE!

Opening Day, the beginning of mediocrity.

Another baseball season is upon us, let's hoist a $6.25 beer to some highly paid guys who at best will hit the ball 1 out of 3 times.

Let's shell out $8 for parking at a stadium that I'm still paying for (with no end to the sales tax in sight.)

Here's to the twenty new 50" flat-screen monitors in the concourses (did they buy them from the Muskego Schools?) so you don't miss a moment of "The Crew" striving to break .500 this year.

Go Brewers!